Getting My Life Back

Tomorrow is the October 6 SAT, i.e., the biggest test date of the year for stressed out seniors. Would you like to guess how that makes me feel?

Yes, folks, that's what you get when you Google image search the words "crazy happy." I feel like a midget (I'm pretty sure that's a little person) jumping in a hayfield encompasses my emotions pretty darn well. No more 14 hour days, no more talking a kid down from the ledge with witticisms about how this is not the biggest thing in their life, which may or may not be true. I mean, come on, that's really easy for me to say, given that I did pretty well on the SAT without prep or bothering to take a calculator (seriously, nobody told me. I ended up borrowing one from the guy sitting next to me who had three, and now that I think about it, was probably just doing that to pick up dumb broads). But not one of my students has called bullshit on me this year, which is a victory. A resounding one.

Things Morgan Will Do with the Scads of Extra Time She Has After this Test Date:

1. Watch hella TV.

2. Make this blog even more fantabulous.

3. Make some food that doesn't include a pre-made sauce from Trader Joe's.

4. Be even more fantabulous!

It's interesting though. This test has taught me quite a few things about myself. Numero Uno is that I'm quite a bit more Type A than I thought I was. Numero two is that it is possible to look cute even under scads of pressure and time restraints. The key is to have a comfortable, mix and match wardrobe that you can throw on the back of a chair and put on again without worries. The final thing I've learned is to keep a tube of mascara and some eye makeup remover pads in your purse at all times. Eye makeup that looked lovely at 7:30 in the morning can look like ass at 9:00 at night. Swipe it off, layer it full of mascara (I've been using Benefit Bad Gal), and you look fresh in about one minute flat!

Finally, the last thing I've learned is not from my life as a stressed out tutor, but rather from Rock of Love, which I somehow managed to watch, despite my hectic schedule. The fact that I learned will guide my life and all future decisions I make. The girl with the big hair and the stripper dress does not always get the man. Isn't that something that we should all remember?