Today's guest columnist to Cult of the Black Sweater is my good friend, Wally. Wally is a walrus, and yes, he resents his uncreative, alliterative name. But Wally is also quite the fashionista. Here are some of Wally's favorite things:
As you can see, Wally is especially fond of shapeless dresses. After all, he's a walrus. That's why he loves this dress that Kelly Clarkson recently wore to the ASCAP Awards:
(Sorry if you can't see it--I shamelessly stole it from a website where to get the bigger version, I had create an account. And I'm lazy. Just so you know, it's a potato sack.)
Take it away, Wally:
My loveliest trout sandwiches:
Don't you just love this dress? It is fabulous, is it not? I can imagine it draped on the supple flesh of a female walrus, such as my dear heart Wilhelmina. She would wear it with much style, especially having just used her at home tusk-whitening kit. Much like your darling Ms. Clarkson here, it seems. In fact, is Ms. Clarkson a walrus? I mean, judging from the shapely legs, I imagine that she is not, but I can't really tell what's underneath the loveliest of dresses. If so, is she available for a twilight romp on the beach? I make a damn good sushi surpise.
Oh, and Wilhelmina--don't hate the playa. Hate the game.
Wallace P. Walrus, Esq.
As you can see, Wally is especially fond of shapeless dresses. After all, he's a walrus. That's why he loves this dress that Kelly Clarkson recently wore to the ASCAP Awards:
(Sorry if you can't see it--I shamelessly stole it from a website where to get the bigger version, I had create an account. And I'm lazy. Just so you know, it's a potato sack.)Take it away, Wally:
My loveliest trout sandwiches:
Don't you just love this dress? It is fabulous, is it not? I can imagine it draped on the supple flesh of a female walrus, such as my dear heart Wilhelmina. She would wear it with much style, especially having just used her at home tusk-whitening kit. Much like your darling Ms. Clarkson here, it seems. In fact, is Ms. Clarkson a walrus? I mean, judging from the shapely legs, I imagine that she is not, but I can't really tell what's underneath the loveliest of dresses. If so, is she available for a twilight romp on the beach? I make a damn good sushi surpise.
Oh, and Wilhelmina--don't hate the playa. Hate the game.
Wallace P. Walrus, Esq.
2 comments:
You've got game, Wally.
Love to moo moo Wally.
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